Coming Home

These past few months I have been avoiding anything religious.

I guess I'm just too ashamed to face God, because I know I don't deserve Him. I may be a good girl in the outside, but there's a lot of things people don't know or see (or would want to see) that's going on inside me. I don't go to church as much as I know I should, and when I have no choice but to go to mass I don't fall in line to get the Eucharist. I don't pray as much as I should, I don't talk about God. I've had this blog for almost a year now, but I can honestly say that this is my first entry about my dying faith.

I still believe. It's just that I'm ashamed and guilty and yet I can't do anything about that. I don't want to. And it's scary because I know at the end of it all I'd have to face the music.

I don't know how to get back to Him. I need some deep soul searching. Good thing walang pasok sa Friday.

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I went to ICT Riverbanks yesterday, and passed my resume. The original plan was to pass it to ACA, a video renting shop just walking distance from my house. But when I got there, they were still closed so I decided to go to ICT. It took me about five hours or so before I got out. I was put in the waiting list for part time employees. Wala pa kasing opening ngayon. I honestly feel good that wala since I don't want to go back to a call center again, even if it is the only industry that undergrads like me are in demand, in the moment.

Mom did pass my resume to ACA, though.

I'd be going to a job fair tomorrow at Riverbanks. We'll see.

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It was raining hard last night. Sarap matulog!

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I want to start writing again to post in my oodling blog. And post it in TeenTalk.
Hmm...

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I'm thinking of alibis so I could avoid going to the airport when Mama and Papa leaves for the States. I do not want to go the airport. Too many sad memories. Hmm...

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I need to go home. I'll be getting quick lunch (PIZZA!) sa Recto. Later.