Treading on Dangerous Waters

I don't know why it is so difficult for me to find my place within my waive mates. BTW, that's what we call each other instead of "classmates" because, duh, we ain't in a class. I'm part of Waive 18. (The number is starting to become the number of the year for me...)

The call center industry, as far as I am concerned, is the most complex of all. (This coming from a girl who has no other work experience except from "freelance tutoring" that lasted from 3 days to a week + one day.) From age gaps to varying "ways of living", the 25 people I'm bound to be (stuck) with within the next five weeks (starting Monday) are so diverse its overwhelming. And of them, I know and like only 2. And that's only because only Toni and Dawn are the people I don't feel scared to be with.

Don't even ask me why I'm scared to be with people. I don't know what I would say. Perhaps, and this is a really big perhaps, I am just tired of spilling my guts to people after all the days of trying to sell myself to employers.

Aside from wallowing in self-pity for not having an existing love life, and being scared to be with people so diverse and different from me, I am also busy with stopping myself from thinking of the things I can buy with my money come payday. It's a dangerous thing --- to "count your chickens before they hatch" --- and once again, I am scared.

I need to stop doing all of the three. I don't know where I should start but I'll get there.


Wherever there is.